Jets Sign Joe Namath

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - In a move designed to "move the team forward at light speed," New York Jets owner Woody Johnson on Tuesday announced the re-signing of Hall of Fame and Super Bowl MVP quarterback Joe Namath to a guaranteed three-year contract worth $48 million.

"I'm baaaaack, baby," said the 83 year-old Namath at Tuesday's press conference, while flashing his trademark toothy grin. "I'm well rested and ready to go!"

When asked about the Jets chances for the 2026 season, Johnson responded "clearly, this places the Jets among the most feared of teams in the league. Our chances for winning a Super Bowl championship just went to the stratosphere." Namath would begin practicing with the team immediately in preparation for their September 13th opener against Tennessee.

Reaction around the league was mixed.

"They did what?" said Seahawks coach Mike Macdonald. "Goddammit, we had high hopes of repeating as champions, and now this."

In New England, coach Mike Vrabel of the AFC Champion Patriots was more reserved in his reaction. "Sure, we have to play the Jets twice a season, being they're our divisional opponents," Vrabel said. "We're confident we'll do well against Namath." However, it was learned through team sources that shortly after his comments Vrabel was found in the stadium locker room, throwing up his lunch.

In Buffalo, upon hearing the news, Bills coach Joe Brady reportedly screamed "shit! shit! shit!" then threw a chair out of his office window.

And in Times Square and estimated 5000 fans gathered after hearing the news for a celebration that lasted for several hours. Fans chanted "Broadway Joe is back!" and "First the Knicks, now the Jets are in the mix!"